Tuesday, August 14, 2007
I thought I would answer some of the most frequently asked questions and reply with an answer to the most frequent comments. I figured if strangers are wondering these things then I'm sure my blog readers are as well. Notice I didn't refer to you, blog readers, as strangers for some reason I feel like you are some sort of distant friend or relative I suppose it's because I read about your lives and can relate to most of your experiences. Does that make me weird? Probably, but oh well!
1. Did you use fertility drugs?
No, we did not use fertility drugs. I suppose those who know us that have asked us this assume so because Jimmy and I waited so long to have children. We waited 10 years. Early in our marriage neither one of use were sure we wanted children, but after 10 years and getting to do everything we wanted to do earlier on , travel, have sports cars, spend money on just ourselves, it seemed like the next step, one we did not take lightly and one we are very committed to. This question insults some and I can see why, however it has never insulted me. I assume maybe if I had used fertility drugs I might feel different but I doubt it.
2. Do you have twins in your family?
Yes, my great-grandfather was a twin. They were both boys as well. My grandmother says they are identical, but my own personal opinion is that they are not, not after all I have learned about twins. Grandpa was I believe 95 when he died, just about two years before I had the twins. I wish he would have gotten to see them, he would have been so proud. From what I understand from the doctors and what I have read is that fraternal twins on the mothers side can be hereditary, however identical twins are just by chance.
3. Are they twins or are they brothers or cousins?
This statement is usually followed by, "well they sure don't look anything alike." No they don't because they are not identical, they are fraternal, which is just like having two children at different time, however I had them at one time. They are brothers they look like brothers would look at they been born at different times. Most fraternal twins don't look identical although some do, for example Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen are fraternal twins, but look very similar.
4. Bless your heart, your got double trouble there!
Well yes, but I'm already aware of that. Do you want to come over and babysit so you can confirm this? Now I wouldn't really say this and it's usually older ladies that make this comment, but I do sometimes get tired of hearing it because it is said numerous time on the same day when we are out and about.
5. Are they twins? Well where did all your hair go?
This one is usually directed at Karter. Karter has hair, it's just lighter than Kolton's. He does not have as much as Kolton's however once again they are fraternal not identical so I don't know why we are so worried about Karter's hair.
6. How do you do it all? Do you have help?
I don't know what having one child is like, I had two at one time. When put in this situation one learns to adapt and fast. I won't lie it was hard at first, but as they age it gets easier. I do have help, my husband is a huge help and very, very involved. I think this is more the norm, with families with multiples. I also have family and friends who are always ready to babysit, however we haven't taken many people up on this. It may be hard to believe but I actually like spending time with my kids. I don't want to miss anything. That is however not saying I never get tired and need a break I do, but 99% of the time I would rather be with them and the hubby, than out and about.
Then I also get many, many stares and most the time people smile or say "what a double blessing" others kind of look horrified.