Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Having Issues

Kolton has been having separation issues lately. It really started about a month ago when we started attending church. The first couple of times he stayed in the nursery with no problems. The nursery workers only reported that he became sad at times and his bottom lip would pucker but he was still playing. The third time he did not want to go in but we encouraged him to then we left. Our church nursery provides pagers to the parents and on the third visit I got paged. They couldn't seem to calm him and he had tried to climb over the wall and busted his lip.

The next two services we tried to take him in to church with us. He really enjoyed the praise and worship part but by the time the pastor began he had had enough and began to talk and whine loudly. So I ended up taking them both the the lobby and trying to corral them. The next time we tried I decided to go into the nursery with them and leave when he was playing. He was very nervous but at snack time I slipped out, 3 mins later I was paged back in. I ended up staying the reminder of the time with the boys in the nursery.

At this point Jimmy and I were beginning to become frustrated as to what to do. We both wanted to be able to attend the church service and know that Kolton was fine in the nursery. It was also becoming a drag taking turns sitting in the lobby. As anyone with children knows trying to contain them in a place that is full of stuff they want to touch, climb on, jump off of, and to keep them quiet is just hard ,times that by two and there you have it.

After debating on whether one of us should stay home at the next service, we decided to go anyway. Kolton needs to learn it's ok and that we will always come back, but we were nervous. It was Jimmy's turn to get them if we got paged and he was not looking forward to sitting in the lobby again. I decided to try a different approach. I would take them to the nursery by myself, I would tell them both I would come back to get them in 45 mins(they do very well if you give them a time frame). At the door Kolton got teary eyed and kept saying "I go momma's lap" I told him no that he would have fun. A very nice lady who's name I did not get took him in her arms,as a side note I allowed them to take their comfort items,binkies and lovies, it seemed to help Kolton. I looked in about 5 mins later and Kolton was still being held be he was no longer crying and seemed ok. We did not get paged that service and both enjoyed the church service. As I went to pick them up from the nursery I peaked in before I went to the door. Karter was playing with a little girl with a toy kitchen, Kolton was still with the very nice lady. They had made sticker books and Kolton seemed proud of his. He was not crying and seemed content.

I really appreciated the extra time and care that the nursery worker took to comfort Kolton. It not only allowed both Jimmy and I to sit in a service together, it also showed Kolton that we will always come back.

On a side not it changed my mind as well. Our church likes for you to be involved. Weather it be a door greeter, nursery worker, coffee server, whatever just something to keep you involved and to help you meet people at the church. When I was initially thinking about what I would like to do, my first thought was, well I don't want to work in the nursery, not when I basically have a nursery at home, but two things changed my mind, the first being the day I spent with the boys in the nursery. All the kids are so cute and it might be fun to play with them. What really made me change my mind was the kind, extra care that the nice nursery lady gave Kolton. It really helped him and in turn helped me not only to get to hear a full service with my husband but it helped change and in turn helped me decided to work in the nursery. I think it's going to be fun and I actually look forward to it.

I need to add that Karter has not been having and issue with the nursery. He goes right in and plays. He does however began to get concerned when Kolton cries so it's nice for both of them when he doesn't.


Silver said...

So glad that it went better for you. One of my boys is more out going, the other one freaks out in those kind of situations. Good luck and hope you continue to be able to enjoy the services with your hubby.