I have phobia's. To be more precise I have a phobia of driving places that I don't know how to get to even if I follow someone or if I would get to go to some place really cool. If it involves driving in a busy city where there is lots of room for error I won't go, unless someone else drives.
When my brother called and asked me earlier this week if I would like to go to the Omniplex with him and his wife and Collin, as soon as the words left his mouth I thought how would I get there? His car does not have enough room for all of us and neither does mine. My mother has the same phobia, which I believe it where I learned it from. Anyway, I wanted to go but knew that because of my fears unless someone else drove then I would not be going along. Yesterday, his wife called to see if I would be going. I had thought all week about it and thought to myself that I should beat this fear and just follow them, but I couldn't. I'm not sure what I'm exactly afraid of, but now that I have kids I certainly don't want to take chances. I think mostly I'm afraid of getting lost or not knowing where to go and being so indecisive that I might cause an accident. Now most people, my family included, would say well you just pull over and regroup, figure out where you are and then move on. I say to this the thought of even having to do this is anxiety inducing.
Now with all that said I have faced my fears many times before, I have driven hundreds of miles, with my brother, who also has this phobia to some existent, to visit our mom in Indiana when she lived there. I have also driven to the east end of the our state to visit my mom when she lived there as well. I made it safely I didn't get lost, no one got hurt and I didn't have to be admitted to any hospitals for panic attacks, thankfully.
I believe this is a learned behavior from my mother who got it from her mother. Our family can have anxious tendencies sometimes. With that said I hope to break this cycle with my kids. I don't want them to be afraid to do something so simple as drive someplace and someplace cool at that.I have gotten better, lots better especially since our move recently. I'm driving places that once were anxiety inducing to me. I hope to one day be able to go anywhere I want by driving there myself. Until then I'll stay a little more close to home.